Kate has surpassed her birth weight and is up to 6 lb, 12 oz and has grown another inch from her birth making her 19.5 inches. Her weight had gone down to 5 lb 12 oz so we were really happy to hear that she is growing so well.
One of the best things about Kate surpassing her birth weight is that I no longer have to wake her up for her night feedings. I can truly feed on demand- which is really wonderful. In my "before motherhood" days I thought a schedule would be the way to go, but I was so wrong! Babies have a mind of their own and if they don't want to do something- it'll make you go mad trying to force it on them! I hated having to wake her from her slumber every couple of hours... but because she was so small I had no choice. She didn't have the energy to let us know when she was hungry.
For me, the night time is definitely the most challenging time of caring for my newborn. Some nights she wakes up every hour wanting food and other times she'll sleep for 4 hours. She hates getting her diaper changed and so she cries and cries. She pours out her dirty business all over the clean diapers and sometimes her clothes. Sometimes she won't shut her eyes and go to sleep. It's just draining! I can get by with little sleep- I've always been able to- but this is different!
But having said that... night time is also one of the sweetest times I have with my babe. I'm held captive by her sweet expressions once she realizes that everything will be OK. The other night the words to one of my favorite worship songs came to my mind when I was getting about 30 minutes of sleep between her feedings... all night long.
Lord I need you Oh I need you
Every hour I need you
My one defense My righteousness
Oh God how I need you
I started thinking about all the times I cry out to God unable to feel his presence because I'm too naive to realize it. I thought about the times I beg the Lord for his help over and over again like he's not giving it to me, when really he is.
God doesn't roll his eyes and say, "REALLY?!! AGAIN?!!!" He doesn't moan out in frustration.
He comforts me.
I thought about the times when I felt like life's burdens were more than I could take on my own. I thought about the times I was desperate for the Lord to deliver me.
He comforts me.
I thought about the times when I was just longing to talk to God. Nothing was wrong, I just had so much gladness stored up inside and I wanted to praise Him for it.
He takes me in his arms and gives me all the company and love I need.
I truly need the Lord every hour... and every second of those hours! And God, being the one true perfect parent, always responds with love.
The realization of that truth has sunk into the depths of my soul these past few nights. One of the parenting books we read right before Kate was born talked about how important it is to look for the ways your relationship with your child relates to your relationship with God. What a difference it makes.
"Come close to God and God will come close to you." ~ James 4:8
I might not have time for all of my bible studies these days, but these times with my sweet girl are a fabulous opportunity for me to come close to God and feel His presence in my life. Because He's there. His spirit has been in me every single day since that hot Oklahoma evening in July of 2000 when I received it, it's up to me to continually embrace it.
Our little Sleeping Beauty is my precious reminder.
(psss... here is a sample of our newborn pics my dad took... more to come!)